Breaking news from the Bardos Vocational Institute of Incompetent Trades People!
I need to set up something like this. I could make a fortune. Every tradesman that comes to the house has no idea. Case in point. Sri Lanka Telecom sent out a crew to install the phone line. They are a private contractor that handles the installs called USS Engineering. God only knows what they engineer. Chaos, I think.
5 people show up. Of those, only 2 are working. Really only 1, as the other guy is the supervisor. Their plan is to run yards of wire from a junction box over an outside wall, through some louvers and over an inside wall. First I tell them they can't do that without casing. So, they go off to get casing. Stupid me, I presumed they had measured the distance. Apparently not, as they came back with enough casing to do about 1/3 of the job. Then it turned out they did not even have a measuring tape to measure the distance. I measured the distance for them, but in doing so, I realized that they only had to run the wire a couple of feet and drill the wall to slip the wire through. So, then they had no drill. By this time, I wanted to kill them. I was on to their head office in Colombo. Their solution was to have them come back the next day. No way was I going to let them go without a connection being made. If they leave, you are not so sure you will ever see them again.
So they strung yards of wire and lo and behold, they did turn up the next day to drill the wall. But now, they brought a 3" drill when even the Colombo guys admitted that a standard Sri Lankan house wall is 9". Now their plan was to drill from one side and then drill from the other side and hook up the holes. Fat chance. 3+3 still makes 6 not 9. Add to that fact that, as I pointed out to the genius in Colombo, these houses are not built like the pyramids. They are not square, symmetrical or anything else. They would have succeeded in drilling any number of holes in the wall and no success. Now, I had to give them the number of a hardware store to discover if they had a 9" drill. They did, so off they went to get it. They come back with a 9" drill, but not 9 useable inches. No-one has accounted for the fact that the drill bit has to seat in the drill and therefore you lose 2". Back to plan A of trying to drill from both sides. You can imagine how I reacted to that.
So I got them to drill as far as the drill would go. Then I made them take the bit out. Of course, they have no tool belt. At least I discovered what one of the 5 workers is supposed to do. He gets everything they need one at a time out of the truck and throws it to the guy who is working. When I say one at time, I mean it. If they need 2 screws, this guy gets 1 and throws and anudder one, and anudder one, etc. You get the picture. So after a trip to get the lug to open the drill mouth, and another to get the hammer, we had a hole through the wall. Then the connection was made. Now it is time to put on the junction box on the inside. Their plan is to put it beside the big hole they have drilled not over it. So I point out that they need to cover the hole with the box. So now they try to stick the box on instead of screwing it to the wall. I point out they have to secure the box. They try to fit one screw which, of course, does not work as the wall is made of brick and plaster and needs a wall plug. Back to the one at a time supply dude. After 4 trips to the truck for supplies, we have 2 wall plugs and 2 screws. However, it is not clear to these guys that you cannot line up both screw holes if one of the screws is fully tight. Now I have to unscrew one screw and show them how to do it.
I won't even go into the fact that they are running a drill off a 220 volt plug using only bare wires and no ground. No tool belt, not even closed toed shoes, let along steel toed. They all wear rubber flip flops or bare feet.
However, no dial tone. That took innumerable phone calls, a trip to Sri Lanka Telecom in Kandy, more phone calls to the Director of the Central Region for Telecom and a visit from a crew who discovered that the feed from the main street junction wasn't working. Now I had dial tone, but no broadband, which is why I got the phone in the first place. That took another 5 phone calls and a visit from the only competent person available. After 3 weeks and a lot of aggravation, I have a phone and broadband.
Then it was the electrician. My oven went haywire and kept tripping the 15 amp breaker. I called the electrician as I thought that the breaker was the problem at first. He discovered that it was the oven, but his solution was to install a 20 amp breaker. I had to point out to him the purpose of a breaker in the first place which is to prevent the house from burning down. He was amazed.
One of the fan remote controls broke down after not even 3 weeks. He claimed that it was not warrantied and that the store would not exchange it. Needless to say, they agreed to do the exchange after I talked to them.
Amal's mother Manil is in the hospital awaiting surgery, so I have been visiting her daily. The other day, I have the tuktuk guy drop me off. After a few hours, I phone him to come and get me. I even have Avanti talk to him so that he is clear. I guess not. Instead of coming to the hospital, he went to Gunfire. Then his phone wasn't working. We finally tracked him down in front of the gate at Gunfire and told him to come the hospital. He comes, doesn't contact me and leaves and goes back to Gunfire. He is like a homing pigeon, except the pigeon has more brains. Finally, at 8:00 at night he makes his way to the hospital. By this time I have been there more than 8 hours and now it is monsooning like there is no tomorrow. I was a wet and unhappy camper by the time I got home.
Today I was supposed to receive my live in maid and go up to the estate with my partner Jez. He is incommunicado, so the whole day is shot. At least I managed to update this blog, get my airport express working and snuggle with my cat.
So that is life here. Frustrating but at least it is warm and sunny today and most days. The other night there was the most spectacular sun set. My bedroom faces due west overlooking a high hill covered in fabulous vegetation. The top of the ridge was flaming red and orange and then changed to a deep shade of aubergine. Fantastic! Makes it all worthwhile.
No comments:
Post a Comment